IDentify your self-limiting beliefs

Tackle your negative self-talk with these 3 questions

There are many things that stop us in our tracks: let’s bundle them all under the term ‘blockers. They stop us from taking action, from making decisions, and from achieving our goals and dreams. 

We all carry a heavy baggage. Usually we don’t even realise it, but over time we have added blockers one after the other like building bricks, creating an internal wall that stops us from taking action. 

It’s time to look at it, and tear this wall down brick by brick. Doing this requires a good amount of self-reflection, i.e. looking at yourself in the mirror and being honest about what’s holding you back, not hiding. It’s a bit scary, uh? Not sure what’s going to come up? My advice: be kind to yourself. Most of the time we are really harsh and demanding with ourselves, so look at yourself as if you were a friend, and be gentle. 

What are self-limiting beliefs?

Self-limiting beliefs are individual truths that we have created over time about ourselves and about the world. They are assumptions that we make based on what we’ve been told as children and what we’ve experienced throughout the years. They guide our behaviour and actions, without us realising it. Some are very personal, whilst others are collectively shared within a culture. 

Most importantly, they are limiting. We use them as an excuse for not doing something. They hold us back from doing something that we really want to do deep down. 

How do you find what your limiting beliefs are? 

Remember: be kind to yourself when you do this exercise. Don’t blame yourself, don’t blame others, just look at it with curiosity and a positive mindset. 

On the free download, read through the list and highlight the ones that resonate with you. You could even rewrite them with your own words, or add your own. 
Select your top 3: either the biggest blockers, or the ones that would have the biggest impact if they disappeared. 

Then for each of them, ask yourself these questions:

Where does this self-limiting belief come from?

What is an example that this belief is NOT true?

How can you make this belief SELF-EXPANDING and EMPOWERING?

Here’s an example 

I used to have a pretty big self-limiting belief around building my own coaching business: There's a lot of competition, the market is saturated, others are better than me, I will never succeed. 

Where does it come from?

Well, it is true, there are a lot of career coaches out there, especially in London and in the UK. My coaching school alone starts a new cohort of 20 people every month! When you look online, there are tons of coaches! Also, there are a lot of “coaches” out there that brag about their “6-figure income in just 6 months” success story, which creates a lot of anxiety and self-doubt.

What is an example that this belief is NOT true?

Every one of these coaches has started from scratch, just like me. They have made their place in the market, developing their authentic self and integrating it into their business. I’m sure if I asked them they would say it took them a few years to get there. 

What’s my self-expanding belief now?

If others have succeeded, why not me ?! I can do it too. I’m good enough, I have the passion and motivation to create this career for myself, don’t let others’ success depress you, let it inspire you. 

Working on your self-limiting beliefs is a never-ending activity. When you’ve finished this exercise, keep an eye on your progress! 

Do you find your behaviour and thoughts are changing over time?

Are there new self-limiting beliefs coming up to the surface?

OVER TO YOU! 

Download and print the worksheet, grab a pen and free up at least 30 minutes to work on your self-limiting beliefs.

Once you’re finished, discuss your ideas and thoughts with a supportive friend or family member. Find someone that will fully listen to you, challenge you and add value to your thinking. 

You could also start the conversation with a career coach. A coach will ask you the right questions to make you think about what you truly want to do, and help figure out the next steps in your career change journey.